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2002-03-02 - 2:30 p.m. Harsh reality in a comic book world Let's not talk about my rough week at work, or the three lunches I missed or the snide little bastard on Project N who's both insisting I do the job I was assigned immeadiately (no time to come up to speed) and stepping all over my work when I don't jump as fast as he deems necessary cause I'm busy learning. Gen pretty much covered the Wednesday night of Sad disaster at the theatre. Wow, we had lots of fun. Wow, we were rowdy for the theatre. Wow, I don't think I like Jacobian theatre. Laura, the overeducted, pointed out 'sad disaster' had a much stronger meaning during Daniel Webster's time - but it wasn't just the phrase - it was the falsetto delivery. Anyway, it's been added to our list of favorite PPG quotes. Thursday night. Post work collapse. Went home, did tai chi, napped, and kind G&A took me out for sushi - satisfying my jonesing for bait and filling up the cracks left by the lack of lunch. Friday work wasn't much better. The funniest thing I did all day was talk to BdeB about his new super powers. BdeB: Fear me! Ha, ha! Thanks to the power of fuzzy carpet, cheap shoes and static, I can zap my CD player off just by standing up! Me: It's called electrostatic discharge. It's very dangerous to delicate electronics. It's why we plan the wiring so carefully on spacecraft. But BdeB is still in his glory: Fear me. Fear the power of EMP! Me: Electrocmagnetic pulse is different than ESD. BdeB: Stop with the no fun. Me: Sorry to bring harsh reality to you comic book world. But, but Da Vinci's Notebook was playing at Westfield High in Chantilly Friday night. Seven people, six cars, and somehow we all got to the high school. In fact, Rags got there just a bit too early for his taste. No one warned us about the opening act - The Rockin' Teacher Band. Four teachers (way hotter than any teachers I ever had, let me tell you) from Westfield with their own rockabilly band dressed in a mix of J. Crew and bowling shirts. And their lead singer could not sing. But at least they could play. Then, Kymber leans over to me and says You know what bothers me about the lead singer? Besides his lack of pitch? He looks animated. Big oversized lips moving on a completely still face. Their second guitar, however, could sing. And he looked like Havordh with black hair. But finally DVN took the stage. If you've never heard them, wow are they funny. Fantastic acapella group, flaky sense of humor, and damn they can sing. Let me introduce the band: Greg "Storm" (baritonus versatilus maximus): Dressed in black pants and t-shirt with a velvet shirt the color of cookie monster. He looks the tinest bit like Fritz. Paul (tenor secondo wisecrackus): He looks somewhat like Byram, but *damn* his mannerisms, his voice, his quirky sense of humor - dude it is so Byram's good twin. It's very disturbing. Especially wearing maroon velour. Richard (tenori primi formosa): Secret Asian man, dressed in safety cone orange shirt and the only member of the group wearing black plastic pants. Bernie (mezzo basso excitus): Imagine Nikulai without a beard, wearing a baseball hat backwards and singing an amazingly deep bass. Except he's Catholic. Yeah, it hurts doesn't it? DVN spends their entire showing busting on each other and the audience and singing hilarious ripoffs. My two favorites "Title of the Song" which is a 'fill-in-the-blank' summary of every boy band song ever made and "Magic Kingdom in the Sky" describing the wonders of Disneyland to the tune of oldtime gospel. Paul introduces the "Title of the Song" number and in that moment between the end of the intro and the beginning of the song, in that moment the singers are taking a deep breath, you hear this dismayed little voice cry out Not, Title of the Song! Not again! The entire band looses it to the point they cannot sing. Then, Paul says Hey, Bernie, it's your kids! Yes, the bass's little boys near the front row had had quite enough of that particular number during rehearsals. But my favorite part of the show is 'request-o-rama' when they take request from the audience and attempt to sing whatever you suggest. Dueling Banjos I whisper to Kymber. No, that would be wrong. Last time we saw DVN, the girl requested "Islands the Stream" - she has *no* room to talk. I whisper the suggestion to Mel, to Gen, to Gina, to Alan. And, thanks to the jumping of Gen and Gina, we got a pick. Paul-Byram's-twin says Dueling Banjos! I think someone doesn't understand the acapella part of the band. Thank you for requesting an all instrumental song. Sheesh! And then they sang it - at least the first 'verse' before it mutated into something else. For their final request number, they combined the songs "Safety Dance", Enya's "Paint the Sky" and the "Theme from Sesame Street". Yes, I'm serious. All at the same time. Without any rehearsal - just off the cuff. Some of their jokes didn't go off as well in front of teenagers. We're just out-dating ourselves every minute here. But, they adapted as needed - desperate measures like Bernie leaping into the audience and climbing across the seats. Which was followed by him trying to jump back on the stage and inadvertently shouting Ooof! into his mike, causing the band to completely loose their composure and singing voices. I am 38 years old and that hurt. Stop me from every doing anything that stupid ever again! It was a lot of fun. Until they brought the Rockin' Teachers back for an encore. During the final number, Paul-Byram's-twin kept looking at their untalented lead singer as if to say 'what the f' was that note'. It was eeriely like watching BdeB watch bad bardic. We laughed till it hurt. Then went back to Mel's to admire the new decor amongst the packing boxes. The paint colors and new flooring are all splendid. Progress is being made, just frustratingly slowly. Welcome to the world of homeownership To which Mel gave me that 'bite me' look. And, before you invite her over, you should know, Gen has an obsessive/compulsive problem with wallpaper. And the wallpaper in Mel's downstairs powder room needed to be peeled ... so we lost Gen in the bathroom, except for her tossing wads of wallpaper out hoping someone would put it in a trashcan. Slumber till about 7 am, when everyone headed to KA&S fest while I (bum) headed home. The Tahoe picked that morning to have it's once in a while doorjam, which means the driver door won't close. I just need one sec with the chisel - but Mel doesn't have one. So I have to drive home with the door bungeed sort of closed. And people passing me trying frantically to tell me my door was partway open. I know you random strangers mean well, but *I know* so *don't help*. If you want a new appreciation of radial velocity - specifically centripetal and tangential accelerations, drive highway speeds around a curved road, where centripetal force is trying to whip your door open against a bungee cord. Got home, grabbed the tools, no, sweetie, I didn't touch your hammers and problem solved. Now an entire Saturday awaits, rest, relaxation and napping. Escape from reality. This calls for a little light reading. And, today's winner in the 'worst available title' from the trashy romance section "The Sheik and the Virgin Princess." You have to give that honest. Next time DVN plays, we should risk dragging BdeB to see his lost twin. � � Scribble to Theo previous - next �